Category Archives: Odds and Ends

For stand alone stories.

The Escape

09 Tuesday Dec 2014

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I’ve always wondered if it was possible to just opt out of society. We have all these rules in place, from federal law right down to social etiquette, telling us how to act, what to pay, and what we can and cannot not do. Practically inescapable in this era, really, but these laws were really a recent thing.

Canada is the 2nd biggest country in the world, and yet we’re also extremely under-populated. I’ve heard once you get far enough north, you stop even having roads to travel on, and you need planes to get to the towns. The idea fascinates me, that there might just be an edge to the “civilized” world. The backup plan has always been to go find that edge and just start walking.

It shouldn’t take much to start from scratch. If you don’t have bills, you don’t need a job. Money is only good if other people have what you need. A good spot away from prying eyes and it can’t be that hard to build a shelter and grow a garden. All it needs is time.

Really, the whole plan comes down to time. And money, but the two are really interchangeable. Society has built this strange catch 22 for us all. We have a thousand ways to save time, but they all cost money. The only way to get money is to have a job, so that in the end, you’re spending all your money to save time, and spending all your time to make money.

The rest of the world can keep it’s imaginary numbers and squares of coloured paper. I’ll pay for my goods in hours and minutes.

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Born Killers: Part 2

07 Sunday Sep 2014

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Zack shrugged Amber up onto her feet. He could feel her fighting her way back to consciousness as he did so, muttering something that Zach could barely hear. He addressed Daven first, mentally walking through his map of the layout.

“Only way out of this place is straight through the thick of it all. We’re lucky this was a secluded room, but I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a pair of guards sitting just outside the door there. ST hardly goes anywhere without his crew.”

Daven nodded, eyeing up the closed door. “Yeah, the Doctor was always a cautious one. That’s only the second time I’ve seen the man since I took the hit. You must have impressed him a lot that he came in alone.”

Zack smiled, “That part was easy, I just tried to do you proud. Took some high risk gigs, told them you killed my parents and I wanted revenge… He never suspected I knew he put out the hit on them.”

“Well lets see if I can do you proud then.” Daven said, “Which way to the loading bay?” Zack pointed out a direction as Daven kicked open the door, deftly putting two bullets into the mooks outside and one in the overhead light. In the half-light that followed, Zack could just see him take off in the indicated direction. He half dragged, half carried Amber along, following behind the footsteps of his foster father.

“Get down!” Daven hissed, harshly pulling Zack to the floor as a bullet whizzed through the shelves overhead.

“I did not bring enough bullets to get into a shoot out.” Zack muttered as Daven fired off another shot down the corridor of the shipping room. It pinged off the shelving, sending another guy darting away.

“Should have thought of that sooner.” Amber said sluggishly, reaching up to gingerly touch her forehead. Zack gave her a worried look, trying to see the gash beneath the blood, but Daven just smiled.

“Hey girl, if you’re good enough to snark, you’re good enough to run.” He winked at Zack, “Get her onto a truck on my count.”

“NOW!”

As Daven shouted, Zack took off running with Amber down the rows of boxes, heedless of the gunfire in the background.

The loading bay was empty save for one small truck, thankfully also empty. Amber slid into the passenger seat, and started poking the growing lump on her forehead while Zack sat behind the steering wheel. Luckily the keys had been left in the ignition as he nervously drummed his fingers on the leather wheel.

“Pass me the gun.” Amber said casually, brushing dried blood off her face. Zack looked at her swollen eye and hesitated momentarily. Noticing the pause, Amber turned to fix a steely gaze on him.

“Even with one eye, I can still shoot better than you.” she said. Zack passed her the weapon unquestioningly. “Thank you. I swear, first time they take a loved one and you get all protective like I’m not the one who taught you how to shoot in the first place. Just keep watching for that lump of a man to get out here.”

She went back to fussing and Zack was struck by how young she looked. It’d been 4 years since he last saw her, she should be just under 50, but then, he was hardly a child himself any more. He realized more and more what Daven had told him all those years ago. They’d just been a pair of stupid kids when they took out his parents, all hopped up on lies about dangerous weapons dealers. Not that they’d been terribly far off the mark.

It felt like an eternity before Daven came whooping his way out of the warehouse, grabbing onto the carriage of the truck. Zack gunned the ignition, heading straight out of the complex. They’d try to pull the gates across the road, but the headquarters was designed to keep people out, not in. Zack had no fear as he manoeuvred the truck through the chain link fence, heading towards the road as Daven slipped into the cab behind him.

“So then, kid, what’s next on the list?” he asked, squinting into the setting sun out the front window.

“I dunno,” Zack said, “I had some money saved up from that last gig, I was thinking retirement in Bora Bora sounded like a fine idea.”

Born Killers

04 Thursday Sep 2014

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The room in the warehouse was pitch black when Zack slipped into it. He barely needed the flashlight to confirm what he already knew was inside, but he used it anyway. The two people sitting before him, tied to a pair of wooden chairs, were as familiar to him as his own parents. More familiar, perhaps. They were the ones who had killed his parents, Deadly Daven and Avenging Amber, and set him down the path he was on today. They were the reason he’d become a hitman

He could remember the day if he thought back hard enough. His parents, huddled in the back of the sloppily built house, his father begging the pair to spare him for the sake of his son and wife. Of course, the pair had no intention of leaving his wife alive either as they shot her immediately afterwards. Zack had tried to keep silent, and obey his father’s last command.  But there was only so much that could be expected of a 6 year old, hiding behind the curtains while his mother’s blood stained his shoes. Amber and Daven certainly hadn’t expected the small ball of fury that flew at them out of the hiding spot.

Suddenly, the warehouse flooded with light, and from behind Zack he heard the footfalls of Dr. Sean Trenton. The name Dr. ST was well known in the underground world where Zack had found a home. It was said that no on survived a run in with his type of gang. It had taken Zack 4 years to work his way into Dr. ST’s inner circle, and now the fruits of his labour were about to come about. He’d never laid eyes on the man, but he recognized his voice immediately.

“Well well, Zachary, how’s that for a coming home present?” Dr. ST chuckled, gesturing at the two trained killers tied to the chairs. “I’ll admit, the pair was tricky to hunt down, but after that job in Japan, I figured I could go the extra mile. It’s not everyone who manages to whack off an ambassador and get away clean.”

Zack smiled to himself as he inspected the pair in front of him. Tied to chairs and gagged, they hardly looked like the menacing pair of his childhood. Beaten and swollen, they both looked rather pathetic. Daven gave him a pleading look over the dirty gag, imploring him with his eyes. Zack wondered if that was a similar expression to what his father had worn, 27 years ago. Amber looked barely conscious, her head rolling at an awkward angle with blood crusting over half her lovely face. Dr. ST walked over to her, lifting her head with one hand to stared into her one barely opened eye.

“So what are you thinking, Zack?” the Doctor moved behind her as he spoke, running big, filthy hands through her gritty, auburn hair. “Shoot them quickly and be done with it? Torture them slowly for their crimes against your parents? This is your big moment.”

Zack hemmed as he pulled his gun out of it’s hidden holster. It was a good gun, it had served him well over his years. Hitman was hardly a typical career path, but his had hardly been a typical life. It was a small handgun, not nearly as useful in the long range kills he specialized in now, but at this range, he could hardly miss the shot.

“I’ve always been a believer in making it quick.” Zack said, raising the gun. It let out a quick bark that echoed in the warehouse, as Dr Sean Trenton fell to the ground, a bullet hole through his forehead.

Zack moved quickly to untie Daven, slicing through the ropes that bound his wrists before moving over to Amber. Daven pulled the gag from his mouth before working on the tight ropes that bound his ankles.

“I really thought for a moment there you were going to shoot her,” Daven said quietly as Zack pulled Amber’s limp form up from the chair, draping her arm around his neck.

Zack scoffed, “Shoot you guys for one more scumbag weapon’s dealer? Come on, Dad, you know me better than that. You’re the one who taught me to lie when I was barely 8 years old.”

Daven gave him a wry smile as he rummaged the crime lord’s body, coming away with a spare gun.

“I suppose I did, Kid. So then, what’s our best path out of this wasp’s nest?”

The Lake

26 Tuesday Aug 2014

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“You dropped the soap? What do you mean you dropped the soap?”

She floated in the lake water as she asked the question, her perfectly level head at odds with the long white legs and arms treading beneath surface of the water. I shrugged sheepishly from the over-inflated toy.

“It just shot out of my hands! I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting it to be so slippery!”

“Well of course it’s slippery! It’s a bar of soap! What were you expecting?”

“Alright, alright, I get it.” I said, my cheeks heating up. “So now what?”

She shrugged, the water making an odd ripple as her legs and arms continued to churn. “We get another bar of soap, I guess. The lake is 25 feet deep, it’s long gone.”

“All the way up the hill?”

“Well, you dropped it,” she said, sticking out her tongue. “Only fair.”

“I have a better idea.” I pushed myself up onto the floatable and out of the cold lake waters.

“Oh?”

“Yeah.” I lay back just as the sun poked out from behind the clouds, beaming down rays of warmth to chase away the chill. “Let’s just swim. You can take a shower later.”

A sharp splash in the water and a spray of cold water droplets answered my question. Oh well, can’t win them all.

First Dates

22 Thursday May 2014

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June walked down the boardwalk with Ben, watching as the waves crashed onto the beach below, coloured gold by the setting sun.

“This is nice,” she said with a careless smile, “I haven’t done this since me and Mark were teens.”

“Oh? Who was Mark?” Ben asked with a wink. “Should I be jealous?” June pursed her lips.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to mention him and spoil the mood. Mark is… Well, he was my husband.”

“So you’re divorced then? Tough luck for him, letting you slip away.” Bem gave her a sly smile. June smiled wistfully, recalling bad memories.

“Thank you, but we weren’t divorced. Mark went missing twelve years ago. He went to pick up some milk and never came home. No one ever found him again.” Ben frowned with confusion.

“So he just walked out on you? Sounds like a douche to me.”

June shrugged, “That’s what my mother used to say, but I was never convinced that’s what happened. Mark and I were happy together, he even kissed me goodbye that day. But then he was just gone.”

June stepped a little closer to Ben to steal his body heat as a chill wind blew in from the beach. With a chivalrous sweep, he slipped off his jacket, wrapping it around her thin sundress as it’s namesake slipped below the horizon. She gave him a grateful look as she snuggled it closer. Ben reached out to pull her closer, but changed his mind at the last second. He faked a stretch instead, blurting out words to cover his awkwardness.

“And no one found him again?”

June shook her head. “I’ll tell you the oddest part though. When I finally got around to giving away all his clothes, I found this shoebox in his sock drawer, filled with 3 passports and over $2000 in cash.” She smiled as Ben’s eyes went wide with the juicy detail.

“Wow, I wonder what that was for?”

June shrugged under Ben’s too-big coat. “Don’t suppose I’ll ever know. But enough about my former husband, tell me more about yourself. Any skeletons in your closets?”

Ben laughed. “Nothing quite as exciting, just one crazy ex named Amy. Some of the shit she used to pull…”

The boardwalk ended below their feet as Ben kept talked, and June wordlessly lead him down familiar streets towards her home. The Miami streets were brightly illuminated with strings of Christmas lights on every bar patio, filled with people out drinking on a Friday night. But the world stopped momentarily when she caught a glimpse of a familiar face in the crowd. Mark’s grey eyes met hers, still framed by his boyish locks and large ears. June’s heart caught in her throat, but as quickly as she saw him, a woman in red stepped in front, and he was gone.

She tried to tune back into Ben, trying to calm herself. Mark would be older now, she reminded herself, not looking like he’d just stepped out the door. She tried to glance back, but all she saw was a mass of people sitting on a patio.

“…Your place?”

June caught just the end of Ben’s question. She had to ask him to repeat it.

“Am I taking you back to your place?” He asked again. June reconsidered, replaying their date before reaching a snap decision.

“Actually, I’d like to see your place.” She said with a wry smile. “I think the ghosts in my house are a little too loud tonight.”

“What are you looking at, Daniel?” asked a woman in a low cut red dress. The man with black curls turned his attention back to his date.

“It was nothing- Denise. Just somebody that I used to know.” The woman glanced curiously down the sidewalk at the passing people.

“Why don’t you go say hello then?” She asked. Daniel sipped his drink as he watched the pair walk away.

“Nah. She doesn’t need me interfering right now.” He said with love in his voice.

Desert Messenger

27 Sunday Apr 2014

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I rode across the arid desert that covered the planet, riding as quickly as the dappled grey horse could take us. I dared not pause as the the horses hooves rained like drumbeats on the packed sands, least the beasts catch up with us. My red and green cloak furled out behind us beneath the beating sun.

A glance behind showed me that we could not pause even a moment. The ground behind us rippled and fell, leaving nothing visible but a cloud of sand and red spice that filled the air with a rich, earthy scent. I spurred my horse faster still. She was a proud mare, I’d raised her myself since she was a young filly, but now she frothed about the mouth as she drove us further ahead.

Suddenly, the ground lurched below us, causing her to stumble. I fell beside her as the ground sank below us, rising into hundred foot cliff faces about us. I stared at the unclimbable rock wall, sand falling from the top, as the ground behind us crumbled further into the chasm. Looking down, I could see the core of the planet laid bare as the beasts swam below, plowing through rock and leaving nothing behind as if they were worms and the planet an apple. Though larger than worm, with massive teardrop shaped bodies, a mouth at one end and a flipper at the other.Whales, I thought, though I couldn’t recall where I’d heard the term. They floated through the air above the molten core, casually eating away at the ground that supported me. It was only a matter of time until one came back this way, destabilizing the ledge my horse and I clung to.

The ground below us shifted as the sand we stood on slid deeper into hollow shell of the planet’s crust. My horse and I backed as far from from the ledge as possible. I clung to her neck, whispering soothing words as the ground fell out from beneath us, sending us plunging into the pit alone.

Suddenly, a hand grasped mine, and I stopped falling. I snapped my eyes up to see my rescuer. My sister, atop a giant flying eagle, held me firmly. I looked back to watch my horse fall towards the fiery core until she was nothing more than a mere speck against the red glow.

“I’ve been looking for you.” My sister said. “You’re lucky I arrived when I did.” I wiped my eyes before I looked back up. She helped swing me onto the back of the eagle.

“I owe you. But first, I have an important message for the king, and it can’t wait.”

The Countdown

26 Saturday Apr 2014

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Justin stared down at the body on the street in shock. The body wasn’t moving. Nor was the car, that just a second was racing down the street. Everyone around him was moving, running towards the body, in panic, but he felt like he was stuck in slow motion, feet rooted to the ground even as the crowd flowed around him. Their shouts seemed to mingle into a low buzzing noise in his ear. He didn’t need to look at the body to know it was his own.

“Hey.” The simple word cut through the buzzing and beeping of the people around him and broke him out of his shock, turning to stare at the person addressing him. He half expected to see a skull staring back at him, cloaked in black, but this girl looked shocking normal. She could walk through any crowd and not stand out, but somehow Justin knew who she was all the same.

“Uh… Hey.” Justin fumbled, finally finding his voice. “Um, this might be a dumb question… But I’m dead, aren’t I?” The girl smiled sadly.

“Yep. Dead as a doornail. I’m sorry.” The words held such finality to them, but he couldn’t help but rebel against them anyway.

“But…” He gestured at the crowd surrounding his body, “What about them? What if one of them is a doctor? Maybe I still have a chance?” The girl looked down at the panicking people herself, taking a few steps towards them. The sounds of the crowd droned in the back of his mind, repetitive like the whine of malfunctioning appliances. She laid a hand on the closest head, though the woman didn’t seem to notice.

“This is Mrs Patterson. She’s a first grade teacher at the school down the street.” She pointed out another person. “That’s Jonathan Dirk. He runs the restaurant behind us.” Lastly, she pointed at the young woman near his head. “And that’s Jillian. She was driving the car too fast because she was late for her first day at an office downtown. Poor girl, she’s going to have nightmares about today for the rest of her life.” The girl looked back up. “None of them are doctors, Justin. By the time the paramedics get here, you’ll have been dead for too long for them to revive you. I’m sorry.”

Justin stared at his would-be rescuers in disbelief, as the sounds of the accident rose louder about him, drowning out his thoughts. There was an incessant beeping drilling into his brain, like the sound of the car’s blinker signal, slowly rising in volume.

“This has to be a mistake.” He said, staring at Jillian’s distraught face. She had such a lovely face, though it was twisted up in distress. He tried to touch her reassuringly, but his hand passed straight through her. “I… NO! This is wrong! I had…” His brain scrambled for a reason, grasping at one last straw. The bracelet! Everyone got one the day they were born. It was plain, but it had a number on it, a countdown for the number of days until you found your soulmate.

“My bracelet! The one that says when you’ll meet your soulmate! It had a number on it still, I know.” He grabbed his wrist, only to find it bare. He looked down at his body, realizing he’d left it at home. But it had such a large number on it, there was no way it had run out yet. The strange girl flicked her wrist, then held it up in one hand.

“You humans always invent the most clever things.” She said, turning it over. “But I wonder how many of you actually understand what you created.” She showed him the small digital display, still reading “1624.”

“You see this dot?” She asked, pointing out the small indicator. Justin nodded. He’d never really considered it much. Never really considered the watch much either, the date was always so far away he’d never given it a second thought. But now it seemed to hold his life in it’s balance. “It means that you’ll meet your soulmate in the afterlife.” Justin stared at her numbly as she picked up his wrist, strapping the bracelet back on. The beeping from the crash seemed to get louder yet as he stared hopelessly at the scene, at the strange girl, and at the lovely Jillian, crying beside her car in her new suit.

“Are you ready to go, Justin?” The girl asked. He shook his head, his brain still desperately trying to make excuses.

“No, this isn’t real… This a dream…” He shook his head, trying to clear it. “This a dream and that’s my alarm and any moment I’ll wake up in my bed and…”

“That isn’t your alarm, Justin.” The girl sadly pointed down at the scene. “That’s Jillian’s bracelet.”

End of the World

20 Sunday Apr 2014

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Dear Diary,

It’s me again, Julia. It has now been three weeks since I’ve last seen another human being. Unless you count the walkers outside the fence, but I don’t. They’re not really human anymore. Just mindless monsters. I did another supply run today. I now have enough canned peaches to last me until the next apocalypse. Given the way things have been currently going, I predict that will be sometime in the next 2 weeks. Couldn’t find anymore bullets though. Haven’t had any since I had to put the last one between Felicia’s eyes. She was staring right at me the whole time. I still remember the look in her eyes. It’ll haunt me for the rest of my life.

It’s not like I haven’t tried to find other people. I’m getting crazy lonely cooped up in here alone. But I haven’t even seen signs of life since the 4th earthquake. Not even any rats. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother writing anymore, it’s not like there’s anyone to read this. I just miss talking to people. I miss my family.

I remember when my grandpa first taught me to shoot. My mom protested, of course, but I wanted to be just like my grandpuppy. He taught me that you always had to be super careful with a gun. “Never point it at anyone you don’t want dead.” He said, “Even when you think the chamber is empty and the safety is on, there could be one more bullet hiding.” I would hang off his every word. He was so proud of his little marksman. I hope he can’t see me now.

Putting away her diary, the last known survivor played Russian roulette with herself.

Kingdom of the Blind

18 Friday Apr 2014

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June watched as her daughter walked past the living room, chattering away.

“Who are you talking to, Amy? You know you’re still grounded from last weekend.” She called out sternly.

“I’m talking to Nana, Mom.” Amy replied with typical teenaged attitude. June stopped folding the laundry in shock.

“Amy, Nana died last year.” She said quietly.

“Well duh. But she’s also standing right there!” She insisted, pointing at the air beside her. June tried her best to stay calm.

“Amy, there’s no one there.” The teen rolled her eyes in exasperation, turning to address the space beside her.

“See what I mean? She’s just blind as always.”

“AMY JENNIFER EVERIDGE!” June rose to her feet in anger. “Do you expect me to believe you are talking to the ghost of my mother?” Amy glowered back at her mother, her stance echoing her mother’s set hips.

“No, I don’t expect you to believe anything. You’ve never believed anything I said. Even when Theodore told me about Dad’s accident, you told me he was just ‘an imaginary friend’.” She turned on her heels and stomped off, leaving June still standing in shock as the bedroom door slammed.

June continued folding numbly. She thought back to that day, 7 years ago, when the company had called. She had been in shock that day as well, and far too panicked to consider what her daughter was saying about her imaginary friend as she’d loaded her into the car for the drive to the hospital. She’d never stopped to process it afterwards either, there was too much to worry about with Fred. But she as she tried to recall, the memory came up crystal clear, as if it had been stored away for later review and she was only just uncovering an old video in a forgotten box. There was Amy in the backseat of the car, telling her not to worry, that Theodore said Daddy had gotten his foot stuck in the machine, but they stopped it quickly and the doctors said it would be alright. She’d dismissed it as just a little girl’s rambling about an imaginary friend, not important at the moment. But she’d been right.

June walked quietly down the hall to the door proudly decorated in beads and stickers. She could hear quiet talking inside, but it stopped as she rapped on the door.

“Amy?” She hesitated. “What is Nana saying?”

Eight, Six, Four, Two

08 Tuesday Apr 2014

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“I don’t know, John,” The man said as he flipped through the stack of paper on his desk. “This isn’t bad, but I’m not sure how the market will react.” John rung his hands anxiously, staring at the large novel that was the product of 4 months hard writing. He looked like he hadn’t eaten a proper meal the whole time, thin and nervous in a suit that looked like it fit a larger man.

“Mr. Cosure, please just give it a chance. I think… I mean, I hope, that with proper advertising, this might be a proper best seller.” Mr Cosure looked skeptical as John plunged ahead. “It’s the start of an epic 6 novel series, you see. The ending is left as a cliffhanger each time, to keep people talking about it, and there’s a consistent language that some characters speak that leads hints to what’s to come. I think that with proper advertising, that might generate some attention, maybe create a dedicated fan base that will help create some momentum and excitement. I just need some help, getting the proper attention.” He looked hopefully at the man behind the desk, who still bore the same stonefaced expression.

“I see. And when would the next book be available, do you think? The public doesn’t want another George R. R. Martin, leading them on for years at a time.” He steepled his fingers behind the desk over John’s beloved book. John bit his lip nervously.

“6 months?” He asked hesitately. Mr Cosure raised an eyebrow. “No! 4 months, I can have the next book on your desk in 4 months. I wrote the first in that time, after all.” He raised both eyebrows.

“Really? That is quite impressive, Mr Baloza.” He said, genuinely impressed. “Well, I will send this to the editor, and we will get this process rolling. Of course, I can’t offer you much until we see how it sells-” John practically squeaked.

“Sir, thank you very much, but I must insist on some upfront compensation.” He seemed to shrink beneath the publishers look. “You know, cost of living… Just to hold me over, for now…” Mr Cosure looked long suffering.

“Yes, yes, talk to Mrs Morrisson behind the secretary desk on your way out. She will cut you a cheque.” He stuck out his hand to the man, “I hope this is a start to a very profitable relationship.”

John collapsed into the car seat, and sighed a great breath of relief. A young girl with bouncing ponytails jumped into the backseat behind him.

“How’d it go, Daddy?” She asked happily.

“Pretty good, Diane, let’s go see your sister and I’ll tell you all about it.”

Several minutes later, the pair walked into a room together. The younger girl burst in like a whirl of energy, jumping onto a hospital bed where the older girl lay.

“Jean, Jean!” She cried, pulling off her backpack, “I picked up your homework today! Mrs Jones says they all miss you too.” Jean smiled and ruffled the younger girl’s hair with her spare hand.

“Thanks, Munchkin.” She said softly. “How’d the meeting with the publisher go, Daddy?” He smiled and stroked her hair.

“They’re going to publish our story, Kiddo.” He told her. “He really liked your secret language.”

“I thought I overheard Grandma say that it would help pay for everything.” She said, gesturing towards the machines behind her.

“Hey now, you’re too young to worry about money.” John teased her, “You worry about that homework, and when you’re done, we’ll write more about the story of Jean and Diane, intrepid explorers in the land of Ashural.”