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LexiBlog

Category Archives: Odds and Ends

For stand alone stories.

Something Sad

30 Sunday Mar 2014

Posted by lexilogical in Odds and Ends, Stories

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sad, Story

Head in his hands, John stared at his desk below him. He remembered buying it with her, at an garage sale years ago. He could practically hear Julie beside him, trying to convince him that hiding under the ugly stain and worn wood was a beautiful piece of craftsmanship. He couldn’t really believe her then, but he could never resist her optimism, and plunked down the cash for the desk. He could still see her face, covered in sawdust and sunbeams, sanding away at the old stain for the next three weeks. His Julie. Now she was sitting in the most beautiful wooden box he could afford, thanks to him. It was all his fault.

He willed his eyes to look through the wood, into the drawer below him. There was a gun down there, a Glock .45. Julie hated it, but John had grown up around guns, and just felt better knowing it was there. Well, she had hated it… Maybe she still would hate it if she knew what John was thinking about doing with it. It would certainly be a nicer death than she’d had. His body shook as he thought about her last moments, stuck in a hospital bed with tubes and cords running everywhere. The glock would be a better death than he deserved.

Teardrops splattered on the cherry stained wood. John tried to will them away, but with little more success than he’d had trying to see through the wood. Julie would have known what to say, she always knew how to fix any situation. Except herself. Laying in the hospital after the crash, he’d tried to convince her that it was all going to turn out alright, that the doctors knew what they were doing. But she knew. His hand shook as he lowered it from his head, towards his lap. His hands curled around in familiarity, and palmed through the familiar motions as he drew the object up to the desktop.

“Hello, suicide helpline” rang out in a familiar voice from his cellphone.

“Hi.” John’s voice wavered. “I killed my wife.”

First Day of School

28 Friday Mar 2014

Posted by lexilogical in Established Universe, Odds and Ends, Stories

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fanfic, Harry Potter, Story

“Man, I can’t believe they managed to set up a Wizarding school in this dump.” Jerrica complained as she and Stephanie watched the water crash around the bow of the ferry.

“What’s wrong with Atheleona’s WS? I think it’s really nice being this close to Toronto.” Stephanie asked as the school came into view. Located on Mugg’s Island, just beside Toronto Island, the city skyline was still clearly in view from the north coast of the small island.

“It’s just so… unimpressive! I hear in the UK, they have real castles as Wizarding schools, and not some poor excuse at a Victorian Mansion.” Jerrica huffed as the ferry pulled into a small wooden dock out of the woods on the sheltered side of the island, marked only by an unassuming statue of a lion.

Mrs Leibritz disembarked first, herding the first years behind her, and touched her wand to the statue. The statues eyes began to glow blue, and triggered a wake of other glowing eyes, outlining a path through the woods with a variety of different birds and animals. Stephanie gasped from the ferry deck along with the first years in their oversized robes, and the younger ones jostled each other to get a better look. Jerrica snorted and elbowed the girl.

“Come on Steph, you’ve seen this like, 4 times now. It’s just some fancy lights. Let’s go get our robes on.” Jerrica turned to head down to the lower deck, flouncing her bubblegum pink hair off her shoulders in a way that made half the boys on deck turn and watch.

Stephanie lingered behind, taking in another look at the slowly fading lights as the ferry moved on to the proper docks. It always sent a chill down her to remember that walk the first night through the woods, as all the statues followed her with their eyes. She was so mesmerized by them that she didn’t notice how far the group had wandered ahead, until she walked straight into an owl statue and realized all the other first years were far ahead and she was alone in the dark. She’d nearly panicked when she felt a cold shape touch her hand, but when she looked, it was one of the wolf statues. The statue looked at her, then cocked it’s head as if to say “They went that way.” She’d scurried away with barely a nod to say thank you.

Below deck, Jerrica was digging out her robes when Stephanie arrived.

“I hate these robes.” She complained, “You’d think they’d update them to something a little more fashionable this close to the city.”

“They did once.” Stephanie reminded her, “Haven’t you seen the old class pictures in the common room where they have all those feathers?”

“Yeah well… Maybe they should update them more than once every 5 centuries. They’re totally lame now.” Jerrica picked at the black robe distastefully. “At least we get to wear real clothes when we go to Wizardtown on the weekends.” Stephanie laughed.

“Well, maybe your birthday present will help.” She said, handing Jerrica a small package wrapped in gold. “Sorry I couldn’t get it to you sooner, but it’s practically impossible to get out of Smallville, Ontario.” Jerrica unwrapped the box to reveal a pair of glowing amethyst earrings. She let out a girly squeal.

“OMG Steph, they’re gorgeous!” She enthused, wrapping the smaller girl in a hug. Steph returned the hug excitedly.

“I’m so glad you like them! I got my sister Heather to help me enchant them.” Stephanie touched her own golden, star shaped studs. “If you hold them like this, I should be able to hear things you say, and vice versa. So like, Mr Gottfried can’t split us up in class any more for talking.” Jerrica giggled as she put on the purple earrings.

“This is gonna be the best year ever!”

Ear worms

28 Friday Mar 2014

Posted by lexilogical in Odds and Ends, Stories

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ear worms, music, Story

I woke up humming that tune again today. It’s the 4th day in a row and I still can’t remember the name of that song. Some days I think I remember the words, but not enough to Google. I don’t even know the name, but every night it’s playing in my dreams, like some theme song on a TV show.  It’s driving me crazy, I can’t get it out of my head.

But it’s not that bad.  On my way home from work, there was this cute girl on the bus. I think I fell in love with her a bit, she was reading my favourite book and I just wanted to talk to her, but I couldn’t think up what to say. We were almost at my stop when I realized she was humming the same song that’s been stuck in my head! I asked her what it was called, but she couldn’t remember either. But she gave me her number and said if I remember to call her, maybe.

Oh darn…

Poem from the Sicky

26 Wednesday Mar 2014

Posted by lexilogical in Odds and Ends, Poetry, Stories

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dead day, poetry

Today’s been quite shoddy,

You’ve fucked up, dear body,

with nose red and raw,

and eyes dry as straw.

I’d like to think straight,

but instead I just hate,

So get your act together,

before I trade in for another.

Do you think the black market will excuse

That this body is a little used?

‘Murica

24 Monday Mar 2014

Posted by lexilogical in Odds and Ends, Stories

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Story

“Good moning, Mr Clinton! There’s some nice men here with latest poll results!” The secretary buzzed over the intercom. Clinton buzzed back.
“Good news or bad news?”
“Zzt- They said a bit of both, sir.” Clinton sighed and poured a bit more vodka into his morning coffee from a well hidden flask.
“Send them in, Monica.” He buzzed back. Monica came in a few seconds later, her brown hair tied back in a loose bun, wearing a tight sweater. His eyes lingered a moment before turning to look at the two men following her, both carrying a tightly rolled poster.

“Hello, Mr President.” The first one began, “We’ve accumulated the latest poll results regarding how satisfied the voters are with their president, and, well, the results are not that good. Would you like to see the graph?” Clinton nodded, sipping his coffee as he watched Monica help them set up the graph. The chart indeed did not look promising.

“Only 22%? That’s terrible!” He enthused, “I’ll have to get my marketing committee on this at once!” He turned to Monica, about to make a request when the second man spoke up.
“Sir, I’m Zach, the newest member of the marketing committee, and we’ve already been working on this problem.” Clinton turned to him.
“Good, what have you got?”
“Well sir, while you’re popular amongst the older crowd, it seems the predominant opinion among the young voters crowd is that, pardon my bluntness, too old and boring. We’ve been looking into what appeals to the young voters demographic, and we think we’ve created the perfect advert to boost your popularity.” The young man smiled at Monica as she helped him unroll his poster.

Clinton frowned slightly, then looked at the poster. It took his breath away.  It was him, only far more handsome, backdropped against the American flag, an automatic gun in each hand with the Statue of Liberty in the war-torn background.  It looked like a movie poster for an up-and-coming action blockbuster.
“I… It’s… Zach, what am I looking at?”

“Exciting, isn’t it?” The young man enthused. “We wanted to establish you as a proper American action hero, fighting for liberty and the American ideal! We also worked in some other things popular with the young crowd, as seen here and here.” He gestured towards the iconic golden arches, broken in the background, and the crocodile crawling at his feet. Clinton nodded, his eyes drawn to the shapely dark haired woman in a short grey dress, clinging to his leg in the poster.

“And who’s that? Why didn’t you include Hillary?” Zach looked a little sheepish.
“Well sir, you see, sex appeal helps generate interest, and Hillary just wasn’t appealing to the young crowd. The marketing committee decided to use someone younger for the advert.”
“I see.” Clinton said, sipping his coffee. “I’ll have to think about this, son. You can go now, I’ll let you know in a bit.” The two men thanked him, and hurried to clear the two posters and leave his office.

As the three left the office, Clinton spoke up again. “Monica, could you hold back a bit? I’d like your help to ah, clean up a bit.”

A Silly Wish

24 Monday Mar 2014

Posted by lexilogical in Odds and Ends, Stories

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Creative Writing, genie, Story, wish

“And the winner of this next award goes to… Jeanie!”

Jeanie danced down the aisle to accept the trophy, her golden wings blending with her golden dress

“Thank you! Thank you everyone!” She gushed. The gauzy wings fluttered behind her. They always did when she was excited. “I’d like to thank my mother for this award, for always supporting me, and my father, for giving me my first taste of fame!”

It was the truth, she reflected on the next day, as she placed the award on the mantle on the mantle beside the others. Her father had been the one to call the papers that morning, when his daughter- She was still called Anna back then- had come down the stairs sporting glowing fairy wings. She’d tried to explain about the genie she’d found, and how he’d granted her one wish after she hugged the teddy bear her mom had found at a garage sale last week, but the papers didn’t want to hear the story. She’d found the headlines years later, all suggesting that she might be some super human, or the next evolutionary branch. She kept them all for a time, but eventually they all went into the recycling bin. Except for one. That reporter had taken the time to listen to a little girl’s story about a genie in a bear wishing for fairy wings, and her big dreams to be a dancer/actress/model. That article she had framed, right beside her first award, a small medal from her school play. She’d played Tinkerbell, and she still remembered the gasps in awe from the audience as she fluttered across the stage.

Her mother had been the one to shoo the reporters out of the house, and the scientists that followed them, tutting the whole while about how she would find clothes that fit now. In the end, she ended up being the one to alter most of her clothes, adding snaps and holes down the back to accommodate the wings. She was also her biggest fan, bringing her to all her auditions, and cheering her up when they just weren’t looking for a girl with fairy wings for the part.

But the parts she had gotten had all struck big. It was a curiosity thing at first, she figured. Come see the girl with wings! But her movie had hit it big, an instant cult classic, and the fans followed their new idol to movie after movie. Lucky break, considering how terribly her silly wish could have turned out.

She stepped out on her balcony and looked out at the house her fame had bought. With a smile on her, she spread her wings and took to the sky. Even 20 years later, her morning fly was still her favourite part of the day.

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