Last night when I went to bed, my life was spinning it’s wheels. No job, no plan, just sitting around hoping my cards would change. But today when I woke up, everything was different. Today when I woke up, my cats were pokemon, and according to my husband, that was normal. So today, things were going to change.
I quickly tossed on some clothes and headed towards the kitchen. Jewel and Katie nearly bowled me over trying to race me up the stairs. “Girls, calm down!” I said, petting Katie’s between her tall, lavender ears, just above the jewel on her forehead. “I’m not used to you guys being so tall.” Jewel, same as always, despite being turned into an Umbreon, just meowed at me to hurry up and put down some food. I ate an apple while the two tore into their food, then got curious and checked out my fish tank.
“Huh…” Well, they weren’t the same fish, that was for sure, but they didn’t look like any pokemon I knew of. Guess not everything was the same as the games. I decided it was time to turn to the internet for some quick research.
Some time later, Jewel strolled up at the computer, licking her lips and meowing. Still my talkative little one. “Come here, Jewel.” I said, palming her pokeball, “We’re going to see if we can help earn our keep.”
Katie was easy enough to round up, she came running when she heard the door open. She always had loved to go outside. She followed me in step as we headed to the meadow nearby. It was muddy, and snowdrifts still covered heaps of matted down winter grass, but it should still work. Katie began wandering immediately into it and I followed her. She still had the instincts of a cat, it seemed, but I wasn’t really sure what we were looking for.
A patch of grass wiggled off in the corner of my eye and Katie pounced on it faster than I could turn around. When I looked, a massive rat stood in front of her, with teeth as long as my fingers.
“Gah!!” I yelled, glancing around to see if anyone had spotted my reaction to my first live Raticate. “I mean… Um, Katie! Tackle it!” The commands came easier after that. I’d had years of experience, playing with cartoon versions safely behind a little glass screen. But when the Raticate stopped moving, I had my first glimpse of reality as Katie went to bite it’s head off.
“Katie! No!” I grabbed her by the scruff of her neck, hauling her off the fallen prey. She looked at me confusedly as I checked if the Raticate was still moving. Still breathing. Guess it had just fainted. I hauled Katie away a safe distance, then let Jewel out of her pokeball too. The two stared at me curiously, as if to ask “Now what?”
“Now… I don’t know girls. Maybe I’m just not violent enough to get into pokemon training. Let’s just go home.” We headed back, detouring along the spring-swollen river. Everything was covered in a layer of ice, thanks to the frequent thaws and snow squalls of the past week, but it was starting to look like spring was winning again. I bent over to pick up a stone, planning on breaking the layer of ice still hanging over the river, when I noticed Katie and Jewel’s ears were both upright, and both of them were staring at a point just behind me.
I turned slowly to see a majestic sight. A tall buck stood behind me, with a massive rack of antlers. His fur was tufted white about his neck, but I could see small pink flower buds covering his antlers, ready to bloom. My breath caught in my throat. I was new to this whole pokemon thing, but moose were dangerous, especially in spring. I slowly took a step backwards, hoping to show I was no threat.
The moose snorted and lowered his antlers, pawing the ground. Well fuck, that was clear body language. I started looking about for somewhere to run, when a blur of black and gold hit the Sawsbuck in the side.
“Jewel!” I cried, worried. The Sawsbuck reared, tossing her off. He turned to charge her, but stopped dead in his tracks, a glowing wall in front of Jewel. I looked beside me to see the jewel on Katie’s forehead glowing brightly. Jewel charged again, biting at the Sawsbuck’s legs and rear. “Good girls! Keep it up!” I quickly dove into my backpack, hunting for something to help. I needed some way to end this fight before the Sawsbuck got hurt, or worse, my babies. My hands closed around a spare pokeball. Perfect! Just one shot though, better make it count.
As I watched, Jewel bounced about the buck, harrying it’s flank like she’d done it all her life. Perhaps she had, given the way she chased Katie about the house at home. The Sawsbuck turned to chase her, stumbling slightly on his rear leg. That was my chance. I threw the pokeball hard, just as Katie let off a flash of light that left the buck disoriented. When the light faded from my eyes, I saw the pokeball on the ground as it shook once, then stood still with a click. I sighed a breath of relief.
“Okay girls, now we’re really going home.”
Back home, my husband was less than impressed with my conquest.
“Where are we going to keep a Sawsbuck? We don’t even have a backyard in this apartment.” He asked, staring at the pokeball in my hand.
“Well, I was thinking about that.” I said, “You know that property we bought up north?” He grunted in agreement. “How would you feel about starting our own Pokemon petting zoo?”